Dandruff - Challenged personal goals
Updated: Oct 19, 2021
Dandruff is a condition of the scalp that causes flakes of skin to appear. It is often accompanied by itching.
This condition can be caused by many factors, such as:
Irritated, oily skin
A yeastlike fungus (malassezia)
Sensitivity to hair products
Emotions at the root of this condition:
Loss of balance between your personal agency and the greater social unit you operate within (family, work)
Frustration of having to change your plans
Poor personal boundaries (too aggressive or too passive)
Your plans are being challenged and threatened
"I am flexible with my plans. I recognize my personal responsibility and let others recognize theirs."
You do not have to compromise in order to receive support for your project or goal.
A compromise is basically an agreement that "I will suffer a little and you will suffer a little in order to achieve something together". It is not a harmonious resolution of a conflict.
We are taught from a young age how to bargain for support and approval. We are willing to give up parts of our goals and plans in order to receive something we perceive as imperative to the completion of our project.
This approach sets us up for feeling resentment and regret later on because we not only now "owe" the other person something, we also gave up on the wholeness of our dream.
You basically lower your standards to accomplish a goal.
So what to do when facing a conflict without a clear way to satisfy both parties?
Communicate with the intention of discovering a 3rd option that satisfies both of you:
encourage intimacy. Intimacy means seeing into another person, understanding life from their perspective,
become clear why your goal is important to you and how it will benefit the other persons well,
communicate with an intention to become closer to the other individual. Invite love and compassion to this conversation,
listen with an intention to understand, leaving your convictions and need to control out of this conversation,
speak about how you feel using "I feel" statements, instead "you make me feel" accusations.
Take your time. You are not convincing the other person to be on your side. You are actively looking for a solution that allows your and your supporter's standards to remain high. If all you knew in your life was bargaining, developing this skill will take time.
It is better to fail at creating the 3rd option than not to look for it at all.
Supportive Oils, Herbs, and Crystals:
Blocked Communication: Lavender; Chalcedony
Feeling stuck: Litsea; Blue Topaz
Feeling controlled: Clove; Shungite
Start resolving the stuck trauma that prevents you from setting respectful boundaries and recover your inner resource of calmness and balance during the Intuitive Attunement Session.