How I finally broke free and understood that my illness actually saved me...

Monika Dulian
Nov 21, 2019
3 min read

Updated: Oct 7, 2021

The easiest way to show you a correlation between emotions and health is a record of my TPO (thyroid antibodies) and major events in my life.

I had my first test in 2015 and it was around 800 IU (normal range is <35 IU/mL). This is when I got my first official diagnosis and was given a prescription thyroid medication.

In March of 2016, I went on the Autoimmune Protocol (an elimination diet designed for people with autoimmune conditions), and by the end of 2016, my TPO goes down to 455 IU.

In one year after that my TPO plummets down to 258 IU, thanks to my diet and lifestyle changes, and corrected medication dose (thank you, Dr. Sarah J. Zielsdorf, MD).

At the beginning of 2017, I went through painful heartbreak and a tremendous life change (I lost my house, my friends, the future I have been building with my long-term partner, and my job as well) and my TPO almost doubles to 409 IU. Despite continuing the autoimmune diet, the right medication and supplements, and lifestyle modifiers, my body reacted terribly to the stress and shock I endured that winter. This is when I first received proof that my negative emotions influence my hearth in a negative way. This is also the time when I discovered and started using mind-body modalities that were designed to ease and even resolve emotional trauma (EFT, meditation, breathwork, etc.).

At the beginning of 2018, I started my life over. I had no job, no home, no friends, I was totally separated from my past and ready to create the future I wanted. Because I had nothing left to loose, I went in the direction of what made me happy, fully, one hundred percent! I started using Metaphysical Anatomy regularly and saw a dramatic improvement in the quality of my life. My TPO went down to 225 IU by the end of the year, despite eating non-compliant foods (including sugar, OMG!), staying up late, and drinking water from plastic bottles.

I accepted a new job at the beginning of 2019 and as I started finding incongruences between their values and mine, my TPO started climbing up, reaching 264 IU at the end of summer. As I made my decision to part ways with my employer, my TPO improved by lowering down to 237 IU in a matter of just a few weeks after my last day at work, once again proving that emotional stress had a profound influence on my health.

Now my thyroid hormones and overall wellness are corresponding to the way I feel.

During my healing journey, the biggest game-changers were:

Standing face to face with my BS stories of victimhood (I used my disease as a way to avoid people because deep down I felt unlovable and unworthy)
Having the courage to stay with my emotions and healing them (and not disassociating from them by distracting myself with drama, food, and complaining)
Understanding that my body was reacting with inflammation as a way to cope with stress, not as a way to punish me (inflammation is actually healthy, it shows that the body is trying to save you!)
Accepting that my pain shows me where I am not true to myself and using that as a guide in my healing (pain surfaces where anger couldn’t; discover what made you angry and correct it)

Living the best life possible doesn’t mean having x amount of dollars in your bank account, living with a handsome husband in the Bahamas, and having a skinny and fit body.

Living the best life possible is about finding approval for yourself, supporting yourself, and being present with yourself.

When you embrace your existence as is, improved life is possible. Otherwise, you are just chasing a temporary relief because you believe your victimhood deserves a reward.